White noise is a random signal (or process) with a flat power spectral density. In other words, the signal's power spectral density has equal power in any band, at any center frequency, having a given bandwidth. White noise is considered analogous to white light which contains all frequencies.

Who am I?

Neo-hippie cinephile. Follower of the great Jim Morrison who once said "If the doors of perception are cleansed, everything would appear to man as it truly is, infinite."

Thursday, October 25, 2007

A Portrait of Greatness

Bengal has been forever known for its arts, and music is probably the most blue blooded of them all. It is no surprise then that over the centuries, the state has produced some of the greatest musicians India has seen, starting from Tansen to the father-son duo of the Burmans (yeah OK they were from Tripura I know, but they were actually Bangali) to Kishore Kumar and finally to one of the greatest musical personas (and I am not just talking about the size here) the world has seen. OK fine, Tansen wasn't actually Bangali, but can you blame me if you decide to show the poor chap some love and bestow upon him a last name, constructed by splitting his bisyllabic name and freeing him from Cher's curse?

Bruce Springsteen may well have plagiarized the nickname of The Boss, but IMO there can only be one Boss in the entire music industry all across the world from the Mongolian monks nursing vows of lifelong silence to sissy little men in English choirs - the one and only (even though he may appear as two or three) Bapi Da! . Growing up in the blind lanes of Calcutta, Lahiri learned to wear dark glasses early in life. Contrary to popular belief, the blind lane theory is the actual reason for the progressive fashion statement, to be fortuitously popularized by Black rappers in America in the mid-80's. No, he does not wear them to keep the bling off his jewelery from affecting his foresighted vision.

When he took the Myers-Briggs test at an age when most of his friends were idolizing Gavaskar and Vishwanath, little did he know that the analysis report that classified him as a SNIP (Sensing iNtuition Introversion Perceiving) type personality was to be proven prophetically true as he sensed the niche market for Disco music in iNdia. The introversion was more forced than voluntary since his ideas were way ahead of their times. He perceived the appeal for the rise of Disco music in the late 70's in the US and just cut (snip) and pasted what was being produced there on to the Indian musical horizon.

In exclusive interviews to the author of this post, Lahiri has confessed that the music in the Indian Film Industry in his formative years lacked enthusiasm and the aura that he ultimately provided it. However, the humility of the man came through as he grudgingly expressed respect for monotonous yet popular singers of the era such as KL Sehgal and Mukesh. He has gone on record to say that the work of these artists was too melodious for the bad boy image the protagonist of Indian cinema was evolving into in the 80's. The Naxalbadi movement in Bengal, which included in its folds the most intellectual of Bengal's sons and daughter's sparked the fire in Lahiri's huge belly. This violent sentiment is reflected in the super duper title song of "Gunmaster G9". However, with the death of Marxism, Lahiri evolved as a person and as a composer, churning out such hits as "I am a Disco Dancer" stressing on individualism and leadership. Like a shepherd leading a set of disillusioned lambs, he led the revolution of moving over to the other side of Marxism by calling out to the average Jimmy with "Jimmy Jimmy Jimmy Aja Aja Aja", relying on brilliant repetitive techniques. His work with the sex workers of Bombay is documented in his ode to them - "Rambha Ho Ho Ho" and is rumored to have catapulted him into running for next year's Nobel Peace Prize (I mean c'mon Gore just cares about the environment, not people and he gets a Nobel!)

No piece on Lahiri will ever be complete without a mention of that other thespian of the alternative movie watching experience - Mithun Chakraborty. Industry insiders, who do not wish to be named confirm that Lahiri was losing his way in his career after a promising start with lackluster songs such as the Kishore sung "Chalte Chalte" before Chakraborty arrived on the scene with "Disco Dancer", giving Lahiri's career as effective support as the wonderbra. As Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "Nature never sends a great man into the planet, without confiding the secret to another soul." And how fortunate we are that soul turned out to be the angel, known to the world as Mithun Chakraborty.


Anonymous said...

interesting reference to the personality test. Guardian, plz remember that your blog caters to a huge non-bong audience. I cannot understand most of the jokes.

oshto boshto,
AK Han-n-a

ArSENik said...

@AK Han-n-a: I don't think there were any "Bong" jokes. That's the speciality of most of my 'jokes', always has been - no one but me understands them!

Mala said...

jug jug jiyo Bappi da! Last time he was in the bay area, I had the opportunity to go out with his whole family for dinner after the Probasi show - was quite an experience! Overall, I just wasn't able to get my eyes off his bling and thank god he didn't sport his 'dark goggles' inside Denny's! (yup, I said Denny's - sadly that was the only place open at that hour!)

ad libber said...

Bapi Lahiri and The evolution of Bengal from a political embryo to an IT hub (lets just use that song from Taxi9211 to mean that, Mumbai, Kolkata, they all mean the same thing if we take a wider perspective). Sheer genius.
Course Tansen is Bengali., Its probably short for Shantanu Sen. (If Shaan could do it, why not he?)

ArSENik said...

@ad libber: Yes, Shantanu Sen sounds right. In that sense, we'll soon hear Bapi Da as the artist formerly known as Bapi, now known as Pilahiri, or Pilahari (Yellow-Green), or Pilahira (Yellow-Diamond). C'mon Pilahira sounds as bling as '50 cent' and goes with the whole Bapi Da look.

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